Week 12

 Imagine starting your very first day at a new job. At this job however, every time you make a mistake, or you do something "wrong" you are physically hit by your boss. Clearly, you would not stay at this job even though you are getting paid, due to the amount of disrespect, the embarrassment, the abuse, etc. that you are receiving. Likewise, why would we raise a child under the same circumstances that we do not even allow our fellow adults to be paid to endure? 

Half of the children in a 33-country survey by UNICEF reported having been physically punished by their parents. The question here, is why? Why would any adult choose to physically hurt their child? Is it in order to "teach them a lesson?" Is it because "that's how they were raised and they turned out okay?" Quite frankly, some children were raised without car seats and I'm sure that they would also claim that they "turned out okay", but the only people with this claim are the ones that have lived to tell about it. In addition, it is rather clear that this strategy doesn't teach the child anything other than that it is acceptable for an adult to hit someone when they are frustrated with them, and essentially that violence is the answer. A recent survey conducted by the Society for Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics, of 1,500 pediatricians in the United States found that 74 percent did not approve of spanking and 78 percent thought spanking never or seldom improved children’s behavior. If that still isn't convincing enough, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics, "Aversive disciplinary strategies, including all forms of corporal punishment and yelling at or shaming children, are minimally effective in the short-term and not effective in the long-term. With new evidence, researchers link corporal punishment to an increased risk of negative behavioral, cognitive, psychosocial, and emotional outcomes for children." 

As someone that works with children, I understand how frustrating it can be to tell a child not to do something but still have them disobey that rule anyway. However, hitting just is not the answer. The answer is to take a deep breath, and to communicate with the child. It is important to understand what the child wants, why they want it, and to genuinely understand the child's emotions, wants, and needs as well as for the child to understand your expectations. At the end of the day, there are much better ways of discipline such as time outs, rewards, etc. that will teach a child how to properly manage their own emotions, as well as to properly communicate with adults.